Chester A. Bleekman, CEO of Bleekman Industries, a man with a face like a roadmap etched by dubious mergers and hostile takeovers, leaned back in his ergonomic chair, a picture of corporate zen. “Disincentivize transparency, Mr.Peabody,” he rumbled, a voice that could curdle milk. “Any metric, any data point that gives the flicker-minded masses a peek behind the curtain, well, that’s market disruption, Peabody. Disruption leads to volatility, and volatility, my friend, is the enemy of shareholder value.”
“Sir?” chimed a young, eager executive named Darren, tie askew and brow furrowed in confusion.
“Look, Darren,” he said, steepling his fingers, a single turquoise ring winking under the halogen glare, “information leakage is the enemy. It’s the gremlin in the gears, the rogue subroutine in the grand algorithm of profit. The more they know about what we do, Darren, the more likely they are to, well, know.”
He tapped the polished mahogany desk, a map of the world etched into its surface, continents pulsing with the rhythmic glow of hidden fiber optic cables. “We operate in the twilight, Darren. The sweet spot between legality and, well, something a little fringier. Sunshine is the enemy of the exotic orchid, you see?” He winked, a gesture that always left Darren feeling vaguely seasick.
“But sir,” Darren stammered, “wouldn’t a little transparency build trust? Wouldn’t it-“
Windy slammed his fist on the desk, a holographic display of stock charts flickering to life. “Trust, Darren, is a bourgeois fantasy. It’s the opiate of the marketplace. We deal in mystery, in the suggestion of vast, unseen forces at work. The public wants the illusion of control, Darren, not the messy reality. We give them shadows to chase, conspiracy theories to keep them occupied while the real game unfolds beneath the surface.”
He leaned back again, the chair sighing like a winded bellows. “Besides,” he added, a sly glint in his eye, “a little obfuscation creates a nice little black market for… let’s say, alternative interpretations. And that, Darren, that’s where the real profit lies.”