Tag: Hunter S Thompson
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The Ralph’s Doctrine:
Groceries, Geopolitics, and the End of Civilization by a Drunken Lunatic with a Cart Full of Frozen Burritos Power is unequally distributed, but it’s not supposed to be this obvious. Walk into any Ralph’s supermarket at 11:45 PM on a Tuesday and you’ll see what I mean: exhausted cashiers managing checkout lines longer than a…
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Dispatches From The Edge
The Lithium Wars: A Modern-Day Game of High Stakes It’s a strange new world out there, and it’s all spinning a little too fast. The old conflicts—the Cold War standoffs, the battle for dominance between Communism and the West—seem quaint in retrospect, almost like a sideshow at the circus of history. Sure, there were plenty…
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The Pacific Garbage Patch.
I’m putting all my money in the Pacific Garbage Patch. So long, suckers. The only safe bet left in a world gone mad—floating islands of plastic, bobbing in the radioactive soup of the Pacific, a monument to our excess, our undying tribute to convenience and indifference. Every broker on Wall Street tells me to diversify.…
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Fear and Loathing In The Campaign
I am a many-issues voter. By now, I want them all to lose, every last one of them. Putin and Zelensky can tango into obscurity, locked forever in some insane echo chamber of their own making, each one screaming “Traitor!” into the other’s face. Trump and Harris? They should lose in such spectacular fashion that…
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Money Should Be Free
Imagine a world where money flows like words through the airwaves, a filthy river of greenbacks coursing through every gutter and alley, seeping into the cracks of society, soaking the earth, drowning the parasites and the predators alike. A glorious torrent, unfettered by the iron bars of bank vaults, slipping past the sticky fingers of…
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Reverse Koan/Inverted Aphorisms
You’re deep in the throes of a typical day in this topsy-turvy carnival of madness we call life. There’s the chaos of the freeway, the cacophony of the news, and somewhere, a lunatic ranting about the virtues of conformity on a soapbox. And if you’ve ever try dabbled in the dark arts of irony or…
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Fear and Loathing 2024
The madness of it all, my friend. Imagine, if you will, the twisted irony of the aloof leftists—those smug bastards with their vegan lattes and unread copies of Marxist theory—who scoffed at the endless MSNBC chatter about fascism. Oh, they sneered and rolled their eyes, their ivory towers shielding them from the rancid stench of…
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Fear and Loathing in the Supreme Court
SCOTUS Smackdown: A Legalized Thunderdome Here’s the CliffsNotes, man: this term, the Supremes have been on a bender, rewriting the whole damn rulebook. So here we are, America, knuckles white around the latest SCOTUS screed. These supposed guardians of justice have been snorting a mystery brand of powdered liberty and it’s got them raving like a pack of hyenas…
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Grease Monkeys
Fire it up, because we’re hurtling down a rabbit hole of our own making, faster than a Tijuana donkey on tequila. You think you’re saving a buck by shipping your factory to China, but what you’re really doing is stuffing your golden goose and hoping for mechanically-laid eggs, Shipping your operation overseas is like sucking…
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Fear and Loathing: Political Conventions 2024
Red Flood pulsing, Vegas lights refracted through a cracked windshield. Faces flicker on the motel TV, a kaleidoscope of rictus grins and disembodied teeth. The Republican National Convention – a Roach Motel for the American Dream. Cut-up slogans flicker across the screen: “STRONG BORDERS, STRONG DRUGS!” – cut to a montage of emaciated faces, hollow…