Category: Euclidean Politics
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Generally Upward Moving Swine
Somewhere deep in the neon gulag of the 21st century, where men in fleece vests and Allbirds whisper hosannas to their algorithmic overlords, a new and hideous breed of sycophant has emerged—the Tech Toady, the simpering priest of digital feudalism. I have seen bootlicking before. Hollywood has its share of grovelers, yes—but at least the…
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Vegetables
MAGA doesn’t give a damn about tariffs on fruit and vegetables because their food pyramid is built from steak, rage, and the dried-up tears of a civilization they claim to despise but can’t live without. Vegetables are a direct assault on their brittle sense of self—an affront to the sacred right to wallow in self-indulgence…
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Stargate
Ah, yes, the Stargate project—an allegory for the present moment, a monument to the madness of techno-optimism, with its endless stream of corporate behemoths like SoftBank, Oracle, Microsoft, NVIDIA, and others all rubbing their hands together in glee. It’s as if we’ve entered a dystopian remake of the 1994 Stargate film, this time with some…
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Sympathy for the Grift
Democrats are trickle-down economics in disguise, while Republicans are a perpetual motion machine of wealth—promising infinite returns as long as the last investor keeps buying in. Democrats are the sanctimonious snake-oil salesmen of trickle-down economics, dressed up in the shiny robes of progress, muttering the same tired chant: “If we feed the rich just right,…
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Playing For Possession: How the Democrats Got Benched for 2028
“Playing for possession: controlling the game without taking the risks to win.” The Democrats have been hit with back-to-back personal fouls, unsportsmanlike conduct, and an ejection for unnecessary skittishness, leaving them with no room on the scoreboard and no time left on the clock. Think of it like this: they blew a 3-1 lead in…
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Casino Nation: The Havana Doctrine
It’s my long-but barely held together theory that the descendants of the Diaspora—no, not a Diaspora, but the Diaspora—are hellbent on remaking America in the image of 1957 Fulgencio Batista’s Havana. Think about it: a glossy, neon-lit illusion of freedom where vice reigns supreme, the rich ride roughshod over the poor, and every two-bit hustler…
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There are Guano Billionaires that I Respect More than Mark Andreessen.
By God, the guano billionaires—they had grit! They had vision! They were the last screaming lunatics with the guts to shovel mountains of bird shit into the cannons of empire and make the world kneel before their stinking altars. And I’ll be damned if I don’t respect them more than that pallid husk of a…
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The Great Christmas H1-B War
The Great Christmas H1-B War of 2024 is the inevitable crash when Tech, high on its own self-congratulatory bullshit, thought it had meat space in lockdown. These are the same people so tangled in their pitch decks they actually believed they could hitch a ride on the venomous wave of Jacksonian nativism—stoking the flames just…
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Syria
I was reading The Man Who Created the Middle East by Christopher Simon Sykes—a fascinating account of Mark Sykes and the infamous Sykes-Picot Agreement—when the news broke that the Syrian government seemed to be teetering on the brink. It was almost surreal: the legacy of imperial lines drawn on maps a century ago now intersecting…
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A Palimpsest of Power
The Middle East has always been a battleground, not merely of armies but of narratives, symbols, and structures of meaning. Its history is a cyclical tragedy: every civilization that enters it—whether Macedonian, Roman, Ottoman, or Israeli—comes armed with the conviction that they can succeed where others have failed. Yet, time and again, they are unmade,…